I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
