Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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