So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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