none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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