she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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