I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
