I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Vodka?
Forever.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
