She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
well you can't waste a boner
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
