I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize