His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
You are a genius and a whore.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
