I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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