i barfeds in our rink
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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