I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
How external is "for external use only"?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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