i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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