Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
