there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
