i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Randomize
