my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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