have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
