sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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