This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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