did you get engaged???
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
