Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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