Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
