How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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