How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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