you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
