At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
