Me too!
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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