i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
