the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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