You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
