I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
