no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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