She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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