Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
