If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
