I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Say something about gay babies.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize
