Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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