Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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