508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
