Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize