I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Randomize
