he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
