2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
