What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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