No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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