Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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