love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Randomize
