Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
