just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
